I'm not exactly sure when it happened or how, but it did. I've fallen in love, very much in love. And while I'd like to say it's been a long time since I've felt this way, honestly, I don't ever remember feeling this way about anyone. It's easy to love Jonathan, it's not a lot of work like it's been in the past. We get along, well. That's not to say we haven't had our disagreements, as is usual for any new relationship. I mean, we've basically coupled someone who has always been in a relationship and someone who has never been in one for any long period of time. So, that right there would make you think that we'd have a lot of issues. But they aren't anything we haven't been able to talk our way through (keyword: talk).
I've wondered time and time again if moving here 3 years ago wasn't God's grand plan to get me to start over in life. That it had absolutely nothing to do with me furthering my retail career, but really, it was to get me away from the comfortableness that was Edmond, OK and force me to re-evaluate my life. I can't tell you how many times before moving here and while living here, I just felt trapped. Trapped where I was in life, trapped in the decisions that I had made. I hastily chose the apartment complex that I'm living in now, and soon to be moving out of in late June, because I was suffocating in Blue Springs. I desperately wanted to be closer to my friends and just chose the closest place at the time. Now that I have a level head, I will be moving out and in with a friend from Stein Mart. It will be the first time I've had a true roommate and I am very excited and nervous about that. But as I told my worried mother, I'm not in a position to be extremely nitpicky about everything my friend may or may not do while living with her. I took a significant paycut, and cutting my rent by $327 would help me beyond belief. Plus, while working with her, we never clashed and I never got any bad feelings about her while working with her. We both love to do puzzles (which I have found to be quite unique!) and love movies, etc. I'm excited about this new phase that I'm soon to be entering in life and all of the new memories I will be making.
Back to Jonathan, because I know that's what you all really want to read about. . .
He makes me laugh; he make me smile from ear to ear; he makes me want to learn about the sports he enjoys; he is a BIG family person, something that is a MUST for me; he is extremely polite and has wonderful manners that put mine to complete shame; he puts an entire nest of butterflies in my stomach everyday; he takes my trash out before I have it overflowing; he's not a "game" person but is completely willing to learn (as long as I don't blow him out of the water everytime); he listens to me when I talk about my depression and has encouraged me to get back on my medicine; he's done my puzzle with me; he makes me want to be a better person; he sees the good parts in me even when I can't; he's not arrogant; he helps me to live in the present; he enjoys horror movies just as much as me; he's going to church with me; he makes me feel completely safe when I'm with him; he wants to take care of me; I like his family; I feel alive; we can talk for hours about anything and everything; simply put, I love him.
I love you, Not only for what you are; But for what I am When I am with you; I love you, Not only for what you have made of yourself, But for what you are making of me; I love you for the part of me that you bring out; I love you for putting your hand into my heaped-up heart; And passing over all the foolish, weak things that you can't help dimply seeing there, and for drawing into the light all the beautiful belongings that no one else had looked quite far enough to find. I love you because you are helping me to make of the lumber of my life not a tavern but a temple; Out of the works of my every day not reproach, but a song. I love you because you have done more than any creed could have done to make me good, and more than any fate could have done to make me happy. You have done it without a touch, without a word, without a sign. You have done it by being yourself. Perhaps that is what being a friend means, after all.
Roy Croft
Thank you Jonathan for bringing me to life; for being the reason that poem touched me so; for being my friend, for supporting me, for loving me. Thank you.
I've wondered time and time again if moving here 3 years ago wasn't God's grand plan to get me to start over in life. That it had absolutely nothing to do with me furthering my retail career, but really, it was to get me away from the comfortableness that was Edmond, OK and force me to re-evaluate my life. I can't tell you how many times before moving here and while living here, I just felt trapped. Trapped where I was in life, trapped in the decisions that I had made. I hastily chose the apartment complex that I'm living in now, and soon to be moving out of in late June, because I was suffocating in Blue Springs. I desperately wanted to be closer to my friends and just chose the closest place at the time. Now that I have a level head, I will be moving out and in with a friend from Stein Mart. It will be the first time I've had a true roommate and I am very excited and nervous about that. But as I told my worried mother, I'm not in a position to be extremely nitpicky about everything my friend may or may not do while living with her. I took a significant paycut, and cutting my rent by $327 would help me beyond belief. Plus, while working with her, we never clashed and I never got any bad feelings about her while working with her. We both love to do puzzles (which I have found to be quite unique!) and love movies, etc. I'm excited about this new phase that I'm soon to be entering in life and all of the new memories I will be making.
Back to Jonathan, because I know that's what you all really want to read about. . .
He makes me laugh; he make me smile from ear to ear; he makes me want to learn about the sports he enjoys; he is a BIG family person, something that is a MUST for me; he is extremely polite and has wonderful manners that put mine to complete shame; he puts an entire nest of butterflies in my stomach everyday; he takes my trash out before I have it overflowing; he's not a "game" person but is completely willing to learn (as long as I don't blow him out of the water everytime); he listens to me when I talk about my depression and has encouraged me to get back on my medicine; he's done my puzzle with me; he makes me want to be a better person; he sees the good parts in me even when I can't; he's not arrogant; he helps me to live in the present; he enjoys horror movies just as much as me; he's going to church with me; he makes me feel completely safe when I'm with him; he wants to take care of me; I like his family; I feel alive; we can talk for hours about anything and everything; simply put, I love him.
I love you, Not only for what you are; But for what I am When I am with you; I love you, Not only for what you have made of yourself, But for what you are making of me; I love you for the part of me that you bring out; I love you for putting your hand into my heaped-up heart; And passing over all the foolish, weak things that you can't help dimply seeing there, and for drawing into the light all the beautiful belongings that no one else had looked quite far enough to find. I love you because you are helping me to make of the lumber of my life not a tavern but a temple; Out of the works of my every day not reproach, but a song. I love you because you have done more than any creed could have done to make me good, and more than any fate could have done to make me happy. You have done it without a touch, without a word, without a sign. You have done it by being yourself. Perhaps that is what being a friend means, after all.
Roy Croft
Thank you Jonathan for bringing me to life; for being the reason that poem touched me so; for being my friend, for supporting me, for loving me. Thank you.
4 comments:
I'm rejoicing over your happiness. God is good!
Laresa!!! It's so wonderful to hear joy back in your writing again. Be happy and be well. :)
my dear Laresa. I just love you, and I'm so overjoyed to read this post! I'm excited for you about the idea of a roommate. A roommate who loves puzzles is a must (as we share this quality too!) And I'm so happy to hear the peace in your words about Jonathan. Sounds like he's a keeper. He is a lucky guy, to have you. =)
What a sweet post - I am so happy for you. So...where in the world were you headed all dolled up?
Post a Comment